“In family life, love is the oil that eases friction, the cement that binds closer together, and the music that brings harmony.” – Friedrich Nietzche
STEP ONE
Be prepared for anything, and I mean ANYTHING. Your family may say or do something that you would never expect from them, so it is important to be prepared to answer every question that may arise. Have a plan for how you will handle certain situations, and know what you want out of your day. If you set your expectations now - for how much bs you're actually willing to put up with - it is going to make managing your planning much simpler.
STEP TWO
Establish stable and apparent boundaries with everyone close to you. While this is important with your family, it can also be said for other aspects of your life such as: coworkers and family friends. Anyone that even hears you discussing your wedding on a regular basis is going to assume that they are invited, so have a line prepared for them that is going to make them feel seen while informing them that they will not be invited.
The same goes for all of your family members - who may assume that they are automatically going to have a say in the planning process. It could be them wanting to choose the colors, which you let slide, and then before you know it they are picking the entire guest list. Establish just how much you are willing to let go of, and communicate that thoroughly to each family member.
STEP THREE
Be as understanding as your brain will allow. In the end, no matter how much you feel that people are intruding on your planning process, in reality, they are probably just trying to help in anyway they can. Try to view the situation from their perspective and understand why they would be reacting in the way that they are. It is going to save you a lot of time and energy in the end.
STEP FOUR
Take a freaking break - a breather if you will. At times in this process it is going to feel like every single person has a billion questions for you, and you only have the answers to a third of them. When those moments arise, take a day off. If you don't have a wedding planner, and you are doing this all yourself, it is like taking on a part time job. Luckily your self employed, so be sure to give yourself a day off here and there. Mental health is a priority.
STEP FIVE
Enjoy every moment that you can. This is the only time that you will be engaged, so make sure you remember it. Go on dates with your fiancé, make time to enjoy the fun parts - the cake tasting, bach parties, bridal showers, and all of the fun meetings with your wedding vendors.
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